Let's Read Wheel of Time

This is probably a mistake…

Chapter 3: Reflection

Moiraine Heals Rand and declares the strange events to be a result of the Dark One’s flatulence.

Perrin and Moiraine gather in Rand’s room. After Healing is out of the way, they discuss the strange and deadly events.

PERRIN: I automatically blame all the weird shit that happens to me on Rand.

RAND: It wasn’t me — I was awake when it happened. It must have been the Forsaken!

MOIRAINE: It wasn’t the Forsaken.

RAND: Oh good, I feel better. What was it, then?

MOIRAINE: Oh, just the Dark One.

A screen capture of the definition of the word "miasma" -- a highly unpleasant or unhealthy smell or vapor.Moiraine goes on to explain that a “miasma” will begin to escape from the Dark One’s prison as the seals weaken. She says the miasma drifts through the Pattern like bubbles of swamp gas until they burst, usually right next to ta’veren like Rand, Mat, and Perrin. In other words, the Dark One is farting in the bathtub and our heroes are the rubber duckies floating on the surface. She drops the matter with the strong implication that there is simply nothing to be done about it. Sorry guys — we just have to live with the Dark One crop-dusting reality, m’kay?

The rest of the chapter is spent on Rand and Moiraine bickering like a married couple:

MOIRAINE: Stuff like this is going to keep happening. You got to do something, Rand.

RAND: I know. But I’m deciding what to do, not you.

MOIRAINE: At least keep me informed this time.

RAND: Screw you. I’ll do what everyone least expects.

You mean you’re going to develop genuine character flaws?!? I’ll believe it when I see it.